By Marc Gravelle

Did you ever stop to think that the words you use can a positive – or a negative – impact in your everyday life? Simple little words can profoundly affect you, especially when you overuse them. 

One of our biggest enemies is one of the smallest words we use: try.

An old proverb says, “trying is lying”.  I’m not referring to lying in the sense of deliberate deception. Rather, I am suggesting that when people tell themselves and others  “I’ll try” or “I’m trying,” they are subtly deceiving themselves.

Has anyone who said they would try to call, actually called?  Has anyone who said, “I’ll try to be there.” (at your party or other event) actually shown up? Answer: very seldom.

The wise Yoda, from the “Star Wars” movie series, said, “There is only doing or not doing, there is no trying.” Often we hear family, friends, and acquaintances say things like  “I’m trying to lose weight,” or “I’m trying to kick a bad habit,” do they actually do it? Very few might, but the vast majority does not.  Imagine how much more commitment they would show if they said, “I’m losing weight.” or “I’m quitting smoking.” What is the antidote for this form of negative thinking? The first step is to simply hear ourselves say try. Once we become aware of saying it, we’ll start catching ourselves saying it. Once we start catching ourselves, we will alter our thought process. Then we will really start doing more.

Another culprit from the world of words is that nagging word should. We often innocently say that we should do this or that (lose some weight, get more exercise, eat less sugar, study more, make more money, save more money- - the list could go on and on). The effect of using the word should is to prolong our avoidance of the very thing we probably need to do.

The good news is that there is a solution. Like try, the first step is to hear ourselves saying should and then start replacing it with the word need. When we tell ourselves we need to do something, we are more likely to actually do it. Need is a more powerful word. Need also imparts a sense of urgency to the activity that would benefit us, and we become more likely to do it.

Remember: Words create your perception of yourself and the world around you.  Make sure your words are positive. As I’ve said, the first step in transforming your thoughts is always to consciously hear what we are saying. This is how effective hypnotherapy works: the hypnotherapist brings into conscious awareness what is motivating our behavior from a subconscious level. Once those motivators are exposed on a conscious level, we have a much better chance of changing something that will improve the quality and value of our life experience.  

Marc P. Gravelle, C. Ht. 

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